That time I tried to lie

I’m a terrible liar. The worst, really. Every time I try to tell a seemingly harmless white lie, I start sweating uncontrollably, turn bright purplish red, and my left eyelid starts twitching really fast. I also forget to breathe. The last time I tried to lie was back in February. It went something like this: […]

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Tuesday = Muni hugs

It was 7 PM, and like on most days, I was pretty ecstatic to step away from my laptop and stop myself from becoming a cross eyed office robot. And, as on most days, I ran out of the office and made an awkward mad dash for my train. I’m convinced Muni has schizophrenia, or […]

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Am I too old for this?

The only time time ever felt like it was passing at an acceptable pace was during high school. High school felt like a full 4 years – not slower, and definitely not faster. Each year was distinguished by the appropriate awkward attire of the era (Freshman year = I’m Aaliyah! Let’s wear black spandex skirts […]

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Dark Buckerberg

I had never been one with words, at least out loud. In middle school, verbal book reports would render me borderline hyperventilating into a small paper bag that was hidden under my desk. The night before, I would practice for hours until I could recite my speech, strawberry red in the face and Stepford wife-robotic […]

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Unattractive sleepers

In life, there are two types of people: attractive sleepers and unattractive sleepers. I definitely fall into the latter category. No endearing printed onesies with feet for me (I wear those in the daytime. Just kidding.). My nightly routine, at least in the winter, looks something like this: 1. Put on toe socks. 2. Put […]

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The poster

Last Sunday, I decided that I would finally get started on decorating my room. I’ve been meaning to do this since last Christmas, when my boyfriend got me a gift certificate to Home Depot. Yes, my room looked that bad. I didn’t want a piece of generic art. Warhol knockoffs were out of the picture. […]

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Self loathing Wednesdays

Every so often, I have a Self Loathing Wednesday. The term was coined back in 2007 by my friend James Getomer, whether he remembers coining it or not. It was a tricky concept to develop, but after much discussion we came to the conclusion that Self Loathing Wednesday would involve eating 2 dozen Krispy Kreme […]

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A midday stroll

It was the kind of day that made me proud to be a native San Franciscan. I imagined my parents when they first moved to the city from Hong Kong and Fiji – how overwhelmed, excited, and terrified they must have felt. They sacrificed everything for me, so that I could experience a day like […]

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Creepy stalker tendencies

Before Facebook, there was Friendster. Before Friendster, there was Xanga. Before Xanga, there were AIM status messages. Before AIM status messages, there were binoculars. Sometime during my freshman year in college, I realized that I was predisposed to what people call ‘creepy, stalker tendencies.’ These came naturally to me. At a huge, sprawling university filled […]

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