Pacific Ocean. September 26, 2004 ‘Tsing!’ ‘Yes, Tao?’ ‘It’s a big world out there. What should we do?’ ‘Tao, we can do anything. We can swim with the salmon in the river. [Do salmon swim in rivers?] We can watch the seahorses mate and have their tiny seahorse babies. [Um, gross.] We can sunbathe on […]
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I had an interesting conversation with my neighbor while walking home from work today: Me: ‘Hello, Sir. My! What a unique-and-beautiful-looking canine you have there. I’ve been admiring him/her/it for over a year now. What kind of dog is that?’ Man with hideous dog: ‘She’s an afghan.’ Me: ‘Oh. Is she a purebred afghan, or […]
Continue reading →I have really nappy hair, and have tried countless professional and at-home remedies to turn my mane into that sleek-but-voluminous perfection I envy whenever I flip through the ‘Celebs: They’re just like us!’ section in US Weekly. After flat-ironing and de-frizzing my hair to an inch of its life over the last 26 years, I’ve […]
Continue reading →In my elementary school days and straight through early adulthood, I had a paralyzing fear of singing. Singing and dancing like the Jackson 5 in show choir? NOPE. Pretending to be Christina Aguilera at homecoming? Not really. Screaming along to Bon Jovi/Madonna/Guns ‘N Roses at Silver Clouds? Only with 6+ shots of Jager or some […]
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