That time I tried to lie

I’m a terrible liar. The worst, really. Every time I try to tell a seemingly harmless white lie, I start sweating uncontrollably, turn bright purplish red, and my left eyelid starts twitching really fast. I also forget to breathe. The last time I tried to lie was back in February. It went something like this: […]

Continue reading →

Wedding day songs that seem OK but aren’t

So, to everyone’s surprise, I’m getting married. I’m sure that at one point in life (probably when I was a sophomore in college, probably when I would eat Taco Bell alone in a car, and probably when I occasionally purchased clothing items and accessories from Hot Topic) my parents thought this was a fairly far-fetched […]

Continue reading →

The armpit violation

It was 3:30pm on Wednesday, the time when I usually opted for one of the following scintillating activities at the office: Talking to Glen, the mail guy about his preference of packaging envelopes Purchasing a package of Babybel cheese from the corner store, and then eating all 5 cheese circles at the same sitting  Reading […]

Continue reading →